I tried to go back to sleep and after a few minutes of tossing and turning and trying so hard to not look at the clock, I just decided to stay up and favor all of my readers (hi!) with an early posting. With luck and coffee on my side, I hope to not be a shambling mound at work today. No emergency coffee is needed, yet. Just me, the PC and the Art Bell feed should be enough to keep me going. Tonight, I should have no problems getting to sleep… snerk.

Still slogging through the re-write of the first novel, which I am going to restrict to the weekends and I am going to work on I/O Error during the weekdays. This arrangement will hopefully allow me to get something done before my deadline. My big problem with I/O Error is that there is no good ending for this novel. There’s the Hollywood ending, which works in a film, but I don’t think it’s going to be a satisfactory ending for the novel. It is, unfortunately, the only ending that I can come up with right now. While I am a hybrid writer, I usually know where I am going before I get there. Right now, I am walking through Dante’s darkened woods and my flashlight keeps going out… and what’s that music? I am also going to do a little bit more on After Ever with Scrivener and might do that here and there. I might do it both as a comic book script and as a series of novellas. I’ll just plan on it at work. I have a list of chapter titles – see if you can pick out the theme:

Season One

1. Paranoia
   
2. Hypervigilance
   
3. Flashbacks
   
4. Upsetting Dreams
   
5. Avoidance
   
6. Emotional Numbing
   
7. Intrusive Memories
   
8. Anxiety
   
9. Anger
   
10. Insomnia
    
11. Hyperaware
    
12. Guilt
    
13. Shame
    
14. Self-destructive Behavior
    
15. Insomnia
    
16. Trouble Concentrating
    
17. Hopelessness
    
18. Startled
    
19. Memory Problems
    
20. Not So Close
    
21. Trigger Warning
    
22. Lack of Focus
    
23. (part one) Drinking Too Much (part two) Mental Breakdown
    

Good Luck! As more things happen, this might be the one I share with the readers here – I know a couple of you are/were gamers, so having some sort of input would be nice.

Wow – it’s almost 8:00 here and I’ve almost finished this blog and I’ll have time to do a little more writing than just a dialogue tag before everyone else is awake in the neighborhood. Oh – also got the new Hatebreed album: [censored] amazing! If you need music to wake you up and put on your steel-toes, this is the band to help you along. It’s odd that I am writing and not feeling rushed or distracted. Maybe I only need 5 hours of sleep. We will see about that tonight, won’t we?

Well, off to write something and plot something else. Hope y’all have a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

I was tossing and turning in bed last night with my heart hammering in my chest. I don’t know if it was the last drink that hit me at the most inopportune moment, or I was in the throes of a cardiac event. Either way, I didn’t get a whole lot of sleep last night… and to top it off, I have the beginnings of a headache. This doesn’t bode well for me for today. I don’t know if I should call in, or go in and… who am I kidding? I’m going to go in because I can’t afford to lose this job right now. Maybe in a month or two after I’ve cheapened by cable bill, I might take an ‘undocumented vacation day’. As for now – self-medication and hoping that today will be a light day.

At the risk of sounding like Dr. Tannis, the love affair between Scrivener and I deepens on many levels. It makes planning the novel very easy and it can break down the whole project into scenes, which can make the whole project easier in the long run. Rather than writing a long 100K word novel, I can just focus on the smaller scenes and build them as well as they need to be and save the cutting for the first round of edits. Hopefully, it will lessen the chore of re-writing as well. Again – focusing on the small things rather than the big picture. I might even work on the novel I’ve started on Scrivener and see how that goes. Do that while trying to finish the re-writes on the first novel and maybe try to get somewhere.

I am going to cut this blog a little short – time and headaches conspire to keep me from being somewhat productive today. I will return on Saturday with hopefully a better mood and head that doesn’t conspire to kill me.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

I’ve been watching The Following and I have only one thing I would have done differently thus far. The introduction of Kevin (the guy in the Poe mask) was a great scene in the beginning and I was looking forward to a lot of cat-and-mouse with him and the FBI… (highlight for spoilers). They killed him.

I would have done one thing different: I never would have unmasked Kevin, nor given him a name – he would always be called ‘Poe’. Even when he was hanging out with the others, he never would have taken off the mask and never would speak. Even the others in the cult would have been a little creeped out by ‘Poe’.

Agent Hardy

Tell me about this guy.

(Hands Jordy picture of ‘Poe‘)

Jordy

Poe?

Agent Hardy

Is that his name?

Jordy

I dunno. No one knows. He just showed up with a note from Joe.

Never shows up without the mask on. Never says anything.

Agent Hardy

What does he do?

Jordy

Let me put it to you this way: Joe’s Jesus… Poe’s Saint Peter.

I like the idea of there being one of the followers being waaaaay more out there than the others. We get to see the kind of people that Joe attracts. I like the idea of Joe appearing as a messianic figure and not being seen so much in the present. I like the flashbacks seeing him with the followers – seeing the cult progress and grow. Joe should be this mythological figure in the background. We never see him directly in the present day – flashbacks, video interviews, written statements. Joe shouldn’t be a man, but an abstraction. ‘Poe’ should me more like a demigod. Elemental and horrible in his aspect, he is an extension of Joe’s will. We never know how ‘Poe’ gets his orders, but we know that he’s acting as Joe’s agent outside. We should even suspect that there is more than one ‘Poe’, but we never get any certain indication either way. The only time ‘Poe’ is truly revealed is in the end of the season… and that is when we find out whether or not there is more than one ‘Poe’. Personally? Maybe. It all depends on how the first one is handled. It is an idea that needs to handled carefully – we see him too much and he (and by extension Joe) loses his power. See him too little and he’s nothing more than a bogeyman. If we have to have multiple ‘Poe’s figures, then maybe a second one if we keep the death of the first one dubious and only if it can serve to show just how much power Joe has on his followers. The idea is that ‘Poe’ is the Dragon and Agent Hardy’s worst nightmare: a true believer.

Well – I’ve blathered on enough about this. I need to shower and get to work. Hope y’all have a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

I’ve been doing some math (yuck) and if I take a hit in the wallet and buy Apple TV ($99.00) and a non-subscription DVR (they exist) for $350.00, I can cut the cable and save myself about $150.00 a month – I’d have to upgrade the IP service to 20 Mb download to handle all the new attention. I checked out iTunes and saw that with the exception of one favorite show, they are all on iTunes to be downloaded. The DVR would be for that one show and various sports events, like the Olympics. I can get a HDMI splitter so I can plug in the DVR, the Apple TV and my Kindle Fire (provided I can find a mini HDMI cord) and after that – get rid of everything. I’m not going to do this until after this season of Game of Thrones. Getting rid of the cable package means getting rid of HBO and that means getting rid of HBO Go unfortunately. Out of everything I am going to lose, I am going to miss HBO Go the most… sure, I hardly used it, but it was nice to know that it was available to me. The $150.00 I would save could go back into my ‘hire-an-artist for I/O Error‘ fund. Also getting all this means that if I quit my job, the only major bill I would have hanging over me is the phone bill… and the mortgage, too – but I can keep going with those for a few months. The responsible thing would be to save up enough money to cover everything for about a year, finish something and get it out there and wait to see what happens. Provided I don’t lose my mind in the meantime. Kids – if you’re going to be strapped to a job, make sure it’s something you can at least tolerate.

I am going to set aside that Hellraiser idea for a while. As I am turning it around in my head, I don’t see where the drama is beyond the guy losing his mind from trying to the Cenobites to take him. It’s a fair-to-middlin’ idea, but it is not really a profitable one. I should concentrate on stuff that should theoretically turn some sort of a profit… which for me would be going back to I/O Error and the first novel. I am going to make myself stay up a little later than usual tonight and work on something. With Scrivener, I can get a lot more organized about what happens when in the chapters where as previously, I have had it all in my head and make it up as I go along. In fact, the way that this is set up, it allows me to see what I am lacking and what I need to do to keep the story moving. One novel I am working on in my head is falling into place, and I see a nice place to bring in a moment of pulling the rug out from under the reader (insert evil cackle).

Well, my coffee grows low and I should replenish. As always, I look forward to hearing from people and I insist that you have a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

Good morning all. I got some biscuits and gravy for breakfast while getting ready for my private Superbowl party – congrats to the winner. I had fun and I even did some reading while the power was out. Yes – I wanted to read when they weren’t doing anything. I had good reason: she is one of my favorite authors and a good friend of mine. I also apologize for being away from the blog for an extended period of time. This is a depression-rich season for me, so there will be times where I’m not bubbling for with prose. However, I am feeling better with having some good food and coffee in me. Now, if only it would get a little bit warmer.

The Hellraiser idea is sticking with me for now, so I am working on it in my head. I am working on the notion that this going to be a descent into madness for our protagonist. I am doing my research for this – I bought Hellbound
Heart to read first, and there is an anthology to be read as well as to try to work into my series (I also can’t be the only one who has thought of this. If someone beat me to it, then this goes into the ‘re-work for later’ pile in my head… you know – the one that’s about the size of Everest). In the face of all of this, I will say that my re-writes for the first novel continue on and I/O Error totters forward. I am going to have the first novel finished by the end of March and I/O Error finished by the end of June. Valentina’s Feast is to be done by the end of September and Spooksayer: Primum Movens by the end of December. I still have plenty ideas available for the following year (I am trying to get out a tentpole novel out once a year and writing smaller works around it to keep things going) and I am certain that I can keep busy for a while. If not – there’s always dishes to be done.

Speaking of dishes – I have been giving some serious thought to cutting the cable to drop how much money I am going to need to save up before I can quit my job. Right now, I am averaging $200.00 a month for the services. Now, I can drop that down to $58 if I cut everything TV related and up my broadband service to 20 Mb. I’ve been taking a look at Apple TV and if there is just the $99.00 charge – then I am going to cut the cable and use some of the money to buy iTunes cards and get my favorite series to download… providing that I can import my iTunes library. With Apple TV, I can also get access to Netflix – another nail in the coffin. Between that and the digital antenna to get broadcast TV, I am not seeing a need for cable anytime soon.

Well, I must eat my lunch and get ready for work. Bleh.

I hope you have a better day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

Remember when I was telling you about the glories of Death Wish Coffee? Yeah… that was a bad idea. You see – while Death Wish Coffee was very, very tasty, but it gives you nasty, nasty headaches. I don’t mean ‘I feel a twinge in the back of my head‘ sort of headache. I mean the ‘I’ll get relief when I saw my own head off‘ kind of headaches. I rarely if ever get this sort of headache. The last one of those I got was at least five years ago. With this set, I spent Monday and Tuesday with a constant headache, so I decided to do a little experiment. No coffee for the past few days. Consequently, I had no headaches. Therefore – I can still recommend it, but understand that if you don’t have the tolerance, you’re going to be miserable. Caveat Emptor, y’all.

With my head being what it is, I’ve slacked a little bit on my projects – but I am trying to move forward on something. I’ve gotten another blank book and I am putting in all my notes for one of my big tent pole series (Unchained, Unbound, Unfettered) as a safeguard against amnesia and/or death (not that I have intentions of death right now, but then again, I have no idea as to Death’s intentions for me). Not to sound morbid even for a Monday, but I want to make sure everything is covered. As far as I/O Error goes – the ending is becoming problematic. I am a hybrid writer, so I have my major scenes planned out and a major outline – the minor stuff comes to me as I write, but I don’t have a good ending and I am getting to the half-way point. Normally, I get to this point and I’ve got the ending already to be slapped down. With this one – the ending I have in my head is more of a “Hollywood ending”. It looks good, but I don’t think it would really translate into prose. So, I am trying another ending in my head while I work on the notes for the tent pole series. I have to admit – my one big weakness is endings.

I’m trying some regular coffee now, so I will keep everyone interested up to date on whether or not my head explodes. Cup number two before I hit the showers… because I know what my fans like. Oh – I am also going to go see the movie Mama this Saturday and I will give everyone a review. I am a fan of del Toro – loved the ‘Hellboy’ movies and I would have loved to see what he would have done with The Hobbit. I’m even going to risk seeing Pacific Rim, even though most mech films end up being a bit of a disappointment for me. I guess playing Battletech and Mech Warrior has spoiled me for that sort of thing.

Well, I must be off. Hope everyone has a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

No post today.  Sorry all.

About a year ago – I heard of a sci-fi show called “Continuum“. I liked the premise (time travel and crime drama are beloved genres) and I scoured iTunes, Amazon Prime and other sources, but came up empty. I figured that at some point it would hit some Internet site, so I could be patient. Now, I don’t have to be patient. Sci-Fi (don’t correct me) has the show in their lineup and I like it. I have finished watching the first episode. Except for the music at the end (a disturbing trend), this is a great series so far. Yes – I have a slight bias for time travel and against Sci-Fi. Thankfully, they are not producing the show – that would be our friends in the Great North. Maybe this will be the time for the channel to turn itself around. Wait – they’re owned by Universal. Well, there is always hope.

Speaking of hope – I am going to get back to finishing the re-writes for the first novel. Last night, I had a headache all day and I just wanted to go to bed. What’s unusual is that I went to bed right when I got home from work… and that today is the release day for the last of the Borderlands DLC (which doesn’t raise the level cap from 50 – boo). So, I went right to bed, had some weird dreams and woke up this morning after ignoring my alarms. Hopefully, there will be no more headaches and I can get back to it after work today. I’m still trying to work on some plots for erotic novels (play for pay, as it were), but so far I have nothing to show for it so far. Maybe today I can get some inspiration… or a nap. It’s still chilly out here, so it’s good hibernation weather as far as I am concerned.

From hibernation to rushing – I gotta shower and get ready for work. Sorry this is so shirt.

Sincerely,
Seething Apathy

OK – I am now a fan of Death Wish coffee. Well… maybe fan is not the exact word. Maybe… addicted is a better word. I can see why they have a subscription service. I can also see myself clicking on the ‘order now’ button and asking why it’s not materializing on my doorstep. However – I’ll order the five pound bag and see how long that will last me. Maybe a couple of weeks or more… or so I hope. I have my Art Bell (broadcast from December 28^th, 2002 – talking about the invasion of Iraq) and I have my coffee. I am content for now.

I am going through the final steps of re-writing the first novel and hope to get a little more done this weekend after the writer’s meeting. Once that’s done, I have a couple of people who are willing to read it (pray for their immortal souls). When I get their feedback, I’ll start to get the cover art together and hopefully, I can get it out there by the end of March along with I/O Error. All in all – I want to have something done by the end of the first quarter. That’s going to be my yardstick – something done every quarter-year and moving forward. After I/O Error I am going to work on Valentina’s Feast to change up things. After that one, I will start to work on Spooksayer and get the tent pole series up and running. This is going to be the year I get off the ground. I may be flapping furiously, but I will not touch the ground for a while – and hopefully not at all.

I watched the movie Dredd Saturday (my reward for re-writing) and I have to say that it’s a good popcorn movie. I wouldn’t go into this movie anticipating any weighty questions about existence or the human condition (unless your question is: ‘how many bullets will it take to obliterate a floor of slum-like apartments?’ The answer: a lot). Karl Urban is the best choice for Dredd – he looks like the comic book character and from what I have read, he is the perfect fit. I hope there will be a sequel at some point. Sure – it was a violent movie, but it was a well put together violent flick. Now I am watching one of my favorite episodes of the new Dr. Who series (the recent series): “The Impossible Planet/The Satan Pit”. I love the Lovecraftian references and to be honest – Billie Piper is not all that hard to look at during this period. ;D Art Bell, Dr. Who and Lovecraft – could this little humble shack get any geekier? Only if I wasn’t allergic to cats, then I could claim that this is the geekiest house in Kentucky.

Well – I am off to get more coffee, watch this episode and stay awake. Even now, I can feel the caffeine from my coffee starting to work its way out of my system. Oh, dear. Time for cup number two.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy