I think the fish that this restaurant used for my sandwich last night is getting the last laugh. I don’t think I am going to be able to make it into work… so on top of nausea, will come the guilt. I can take a vacation with no problem, but when I call in sick, I feel like a loafer. When I went to school I only missed days when I was sick – I even went to high school when it was closed (in my defense, it was during winter and I missed the school closing announcement). Granted, I liked getting the extra days off from the snow (as rare as it was), but it never occurred to me that I could skip a day. I guess that carried over to work. I call I sic, I feel guilt. Vacations are fine and permissible, they’re accounted for and approved – no one loses. Sick days? Not approved. They’re like the brother-in-laws of the work world as far as I’m concerned. They show up on your couch uninvited, make the house smell weird and bug you about getting more beer… but if you need a body moved, then they’re the one to call since their silence can be bought. As much as I know that the people on the phones would be better served by someone who is not jumping up to purge themselves every few minutes, I feel that if I am not there doing something, I am… lesser as a person.

Enough of that – on to the writing! I am getting ready to introduce more androids into the novel: Mindy (handles the medical issues and integrity [making sure the exterior hulls don’t come apart]) who is going to get a lot of questions concerning people getting a radiation bath and making sure that no one takes more medicine than what’s needed. What I am finding interesting is trying to imbue the other androids (or if you have to get technical androids and gynoids) with a sense of personality, but keep them in the uncanny valley so to speak. The only one I want to have a real genuine personality is Gail, the main character for obvious reasons. I don’t know if I should give the others a bit of a personality (with the exception of Nathan – he needs to be the adversary to Gail… which means he gets less of an personality than the others). So far, however, I am pleased with what’s going on in the story.

My stomach is still squirrelly, so I am doubling down on soup and ginger ale for the day. With any luck, this will… pass and I will be better off by Monday. For now, it’s just going to be me, the TV, ginger ale and maybe a trip out to get something safe for dinner. I am going to try to write and take advantage of the day. Wish me luck.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

I’m going to show my age on this one: I hate these home fluorescent bulbs. When they’re on, they make this high pitched sound that even gets through the other high pitched whine in my head (I think that one is tinnitus, but I’ve had that sound since I was 6… and I don’t remember going to any rock concerts before then) and it’s driving me to distraction. Oh, which reminds me – I need to buy some light bulbs, some incandescent light bulbs – the ones that sit in the corner and quietly glow. Yes – I sound like I should be yelling at you to get off my lawn, but I’m sure you can understand that there are some sounds that drive you crazy (telephone ringing, baby crying, the in-and-out breathing of that guy sitting next to you at work). Of course, it’s early in the morning here for me (check local listings for morning or time to be forcibly awakened by an alarm), so I haven’t my morning infusion of caffeine, so that might be a factor as to the tolerance of that particular noise.

Anyway, back to other things. The novel chugs along and I am still ahead of the Nanowrimo curve. I’ve got a day’s worth of work on it, so if I need to I can skip a day. I’m starting on the conflict between Nate and Gail – which I am hoping to turn into a major conflict along the lines of Ahab/Starbuck. Actually, come to think of it – that’s a pretty good pitch line. I’ll have to work on that a little bit. After I finish this blog and get some aspirin. I am going to try to finish the second act later on today and get into the real conflict by the weekend, where I can throw myself with little abandon into the real conflict. I can’t wait! This is going to be the novel that’s going to put me on the map, as it were.

Thanksgiving is getting prepared. I’m heading out to the grocery store Saturday to get the materials for the stew. For those of you who may be new – my Thanksgiving tradition is to make a turkey dish, not a whole turkey. Last year, I made turkey ravioli (it was good – however if I try to make ravioli again, I’ll try to find a ravioli press). This year, it is going to be turkey stew. I like cooking and given my schedule, I don’t do it that often. So, Thanksgiving is like my Super Bowl moment. All that I am missing are cheerleaders in the kitchen, and yes, I’ll accept applications for the position of kitchen cheerleader for this year. Pictures can be posted in the comments section. Applicants must be willing to wear a skimpy turkey costume and do dishes. Pom-poms will be mandatory.

Well, I am going to wrap things up here and get to work on the novel. Hope you all have a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

Well, I go back to work today. Thankfully, that’s not the highlight of my day. The highlight of my day is going to be listening to talk radio and listening to how they’re going to parse this election. Either they’re going to blame the media, or they’re going to say they made the mistake of trying to succeed with a bad candidate. I am not going to get into politics – that’s someone else’s job. All I am going to say is if you didn’t vote then don’t complain.

Anyway – I am still on track to finish the novel by the end of the month, which is good because so far my plan on getting out of the prison that is work is best summed up with this saying: quantity has a quality all its own. I figure that rather than write a few books and charge a high fee, I am going to flood the market with my cheap, shoddy wares and make up the difference in volume. Now, some of you might be saying ‘no, you’re a good writer – you’ll do fine‘, and would thank you for your discerning taste; however, I want to make sure I don’t have to go back to a job that I like less than I like beets.

Speaking of the novel: I am beginning to wonder if I am going too far with the whole quantum/logical dialogue with Gail. The quantum side is the part of her processing unit that can better understand human qualities and make non-logical choices. The logical side is really nothing more than a sophisticated computer which deals with anything that would need brute force processing. Their interactions are more along the lines of Oscar and Felix, or an old married couple, and provides quite a bit of comedy. The goal is to show how Gail is dealing with the incursions from the Eliza
Jenny (sorry, don’t want to give away too many plot points), and not to have the reader as being an omniscient, far removed viewer. I want the reader to travel along with Gail in her understanding as to what’s happening with the ship, but not be completely immersed in the experience, simply because I am horrible at writing in first person. In fact, I am going to write something in first person just to see how badly I mangle it. If we’re lucky, I will like it enough to commit it to the roster of novels published. If not… then it might end up here to quietly waste away.

While we’re on the subject of wasting away – which is not going to happen here with Thanksgiving a couple of weeks away – I need to get the stuff together for this Thanksgiving Day meal: turkey stew with dumplings, drop biscuits and apple pie a la mode for dessert. I get paid tomorrow, and then I get paid Thanksgiving Day (theoretically) so I have to make sure that I get everything before the big cooking day. Are you invited, dear reader? Of course… as long as you promise to get the dishes for me, that would be super!

That’s all for now, I need to get back to the novel and try to get to the magic number of 15,003. Wish me luck.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

Go Vote.

Don’t Know Where To Go: This Will Tell You.

Go Vote.

Don’t Know Who’s Running? This Will Tell You.

Go vote.

The batteries in my spiffy wireless keyboard had the temerity to die on me today. Thankfully, I have a spare keyboard to plug in until I get a new set of batteries. Poor thing – there was no warning for it, no ‘flee! Flee while you can!’ for it. Well – welcome to the NFL, here’s your helmet. Speaking of needing helmets, Wednesday is coming – which means I will be heading back to work. On the plus side, no one from work has called me, so as far as I know, I am still working there. Granted, I would like to leave there one day, and with any luck, I can leave during the next year and start going to conventions for business rather than pleasure… most of the time. I might have to have a gopher and a booth babe in tow, but that’s for later.

I’ve got to get 3,000 words today if I am to stay ahead for Nanowrimo. 3,000 might sound like a lot, but I can usually get that down in an uninterrupted setting. That’s the key word: uninterrupted. I have to admit that I am my own worst enemy sometimes, with the TV and the radio being willing and highly skilled accomplices. I think after this and dinner, I am going to retreat into the study and get those 3K out today. I also have to admit, I like the feel of this keyboard as I type. One of the few things I don’t like about getting a tablet is missing the feel of the keys under my fingers. I like the sound of the clicking keys – while, yes there are programs that can replicate that sound, but I shouldn’t have to put on headphones to feed my nostalgia. I should put on headphones to keep the outside world at bay.

I/O Error is taking a bit of an interesting tack before I had to stop for the night – I’m looking at Gail as being far more like a battlefield than a character. There is the quantum and logical sides of her warring about the day to day, while there is another battle going on about the ship between two camps of entities aboard ship. Not to mention Gail versus other members of the crew – there is going to be a lot more going on in this story than what I had originally planned – I love being a hybrid writer. I love (sometimes) when the characters go in a different direction. I said sometimes – there are points when the characters want to go one way, but I have to bribe, threaten and cajole them back to the right path. I swear I am not crazy. Really. Stone cold sane. Just me and the voices.

Speaking of voices, I need to get back to work and make some peppermint tea. So, I hope y’all have a good day and a better evening.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

Yes, I know that I am working on I/O Error for publication, but I want to look forward to the next novel – my question is that should I start a long term series (without end) or something that has a definite end to it (a trilogy)? The long term series is called Spooksayer and is a series of murder mysteries. The short term series doesn’t have a series title so far, but it’s a fantasy (steampunkish/western/gothic that if you squint hard enough, you could see some Gnostic influences) series that I’ve been working on for a few years in my head (it’s the series that goaded me into writing). I actually could use some advice. Would I be biting more off than what I can chew by doing the long series or could I alternate between the books? Well, one of the reasons I am looking for some advice is that I don’t want to fall into the George R. R. Martin trap (years in between books). Anyway – my mind is always working ahead, and I just found out that Amazon has a serial option with books. I might do something with that, I have another idea that would fit nicely into it. Yes – I have ideas on top of ideas and very little time with my schedule of work. I will iterate this: I feel that 2013 is my year… unless that whole Mayan thing is true, then I’m gonna be pissed.

My vacation is going to end in a few days (Nov. 7^th) and I will be heading back to work. *Sigh* It’s been a fun few days away from the chatter and the phone sounds. I have one vacation day left and I am going to see if I can get just one more three day weekend before the end of the year. It’s been a productive break and I got some great movies (seriously, get ‘Sunshine’ – a movie that was robbed in the box office). I’m now looking forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas when I get a Blu-Ray player and “The Avengers” on Blu-Ray and make some Turkey Stew and dumplings for Thanksgiving. Gonna be a good holiday season this year – even better if I can get something to press; which will happen soon, I know it in my bones. Don’t worry, when that happens, I will let you know…. unless you happen to hear my screams of joy, which you might if you’re close enough to where I live… in the US.

Well, I do have some housework to do – dishes to scrub, laundry to finish washing and a spiffy movie to watch. I hope everyone here has a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

I went to the Nanowrimo write-in and it was exactly what it said on the tin; a bunch of people with their lap-tops writing their novel in silence (mostly because they had headphones and music – like me) until the last fifteen minutes, when the conversation turned to Pokémon. Seriously. It was at that moment that old age took a bat and a surly attitude to my psyche. I remember when Pokémon first hit the shores of the US. Heck, I remember when crystal meth was ‘the new danger looming on the horizon’. To hear these kids – admittedly, one of the more knowledgeable people there was 15 years old – talk about them with a depth of knowledge reserved for medical doctors or war weary vets made me want to tell them to turn down their dagburn rock-n-roll and get off my lawn. The writing itself wasn’t too bad – same as if I was back at home. Of course, I didn’t speak that much since I was writing. Might go to another one just to see what else can happen.

Now, onto the freaky dream I had. If anyone here is an expert on dream analysis, or is an armchair psychologist (why armchairs need psychologist is beyond me – unless you have some 500 lbs. guy sit on you, then I can see where trauma could occur), this is your chance to flex your analytical muscles. Granted, I don’t remember a whole lot of the dream, but I can remember a couple of things very clearly (coming to a novel soon):

• My right arm is greatly diseased and possibly rotting – I did comment on the smell. I remember being concerned that it’s going to just drop off. Parts of the arm are discolored like I’m bruised and some of the discoloration is accompanied with lumps, or pustules. I remember noting that I have no feeling in that arm at all. In fact, I was holding it up with my left hand (for the record, I’m left handed).
  
• I also remember walking up a sandy hill (one of the settings in Borderlands 2 – Washburn Canyon, I think) while holding my arm.
  
• Another concern I had was my right thumb. There was a cut, or a split in the skin in which I could move it around freely, even take it off on a hinge of flesh near the knuckle. I kept tamping down that piece of flesh, commenting that while it was fascinating that I could lift it up and over, I knew I shouldn’t do it.
  

Good luck on figuring this one out! I’ll be in the back wondering about my sanity.

The novel is coming along well, I finished the first chapter and there seems to be a conflict within the main character between her logical processor (the robot side of her) and her quantum processor (the human-like side of her) as she tries to handle these issues and problems that arrive. It’s shaping up to be less of an id-ego conflict and more like a squabbling married couple. How this is going to fit in with the rest of the novel is going to be frankly a mystery. I’m not a pantser in the strict sense of the word. I do have some organization to it – I know generally where the story is going, but the smaller details I don’t get into until I start writing. It’s kinda neat when I see something start that I didn’t think of immediately and have it develop in the course of the novel… which I should be getting back to about now.

Hope you all have a good day.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy

I got my hair cut yesterday (and I know that this makes for captivating reading) and I went from someone who looks like an extra from Sons of Anarchy to someone who looks like they would at home in a clock tower in Texas. There is never any sort of middle ground with me. It’s actually a little too short, but I figure I’ll grow into the length I like and take a picture of that. For those of you who are extremely curious here is the link to a photo album online. I will warn you – with or without hair, I am hideous. Now that this has been put out of the way, we can move on to other things of questionable social value.

There is a writer’s meeting for Nanowrimo today, and I am thinking about going to it. Yes, I’ve stated that I am not really happy about most social situations, but I figure that this should hopefully help with my writing. I do need to come out of my shell every now and then, and I figure that the best way to ease myself into this is to go to situations where I have an interest in something. So, we’ll give this a try. At least I will be able to go to that Mongolian Grill place.

Speaking of no sleep until December…

I/O Error is still blocking me a little bit. I might end having to do the whole skip-ahead thing just to maintain some sort of momentum. I’m also not trying to think of this as ‘work’ when I sit down and write. This is my biggest dear – I get to a point where I am writing professionally, and I sit down in front of the computer and instead of the joy of telling a tale, I feel that same weariness come over me that I feel when I am at my current job. You have no idea how much I dread that moment. As much as I feel the hand of Fate moving me along at times, I fear that my own mercurial temperament will undo me. I sabotage romantic interests, friendships, work and even fun on some bi-polar Puck-like whim. This is material better suited for a therapist… unless there is a therapist reading this – then feel free to barrage me with questions privately. For now, I will let this stand and move on to other things.

While my first novel is getting edited, I am getting together other things: website hosting for starters. I do plan on having a website to hock my wares and garner attention. So far, all the reviews I’ve read leads me to believe that Host Gator is the best one, and for about $300.00 a year, I can not only get hosting, but also get Search Engine Optimization – meaning that my website will be placed higher on a search engine list like Google and DuckDuckGo. I just have to ask them about credit card processing… which means I can use my work expertise outside of the job for a change.

Oh – let me also push a book on y’all: Babylon Confidential by Claudia Christian (Ivanova – that’s all I need to say). I got this book Friday and I finished about 80% percent of it that day. It is a hard book to put down, and I would advance it as a cautionary tale for those who have dreams of taking L.A. and Hollywood by storm. If I ever have the privilege of meeting Ms. Christian in person, I’ll have to have her sign my copy. After this, I’m going to real Rule 34 as well as try to finish up a couple of private books. I’ve been letting too many of them drop by the wayside as of late.

Well, that’s all for now. I wish you a good day and good fortune.

Sincerely,

Seething Apathy